Preston North End FC

Blackpool Tower is falling down,
Falling down, falling down,
Blackpool Tower is falling down,
Poor old Blackpool.
Build it up in blue and white,
Blue and white, blue and white,
Build it up in blue and white,
Poor old Blackpool.

Build a bonfire,
Build a bonfire,
Put the Burnley on the top,
Put the Blackpool in the middle,
Then burn the fucking lot.

Chim Chimeney, chim chimeney,
Chim chim cheroo.
We hate those bastards in claret and blue.

Walking down Church Street,
Swinging a chain,
A cockney came along,
And asked me my name,
So I punched him in the teeth,
And I kicked him in the head,
Now that Cockney is dead,
We hate cockneys and we hate cockneys,
We hate cockneys and we hate cockneys,
We hate cockneys and we hate cockneys,
We are the Preston Agro.

Cheer up Steve McMahon,
Oh what can it mean, to a,
Sad baldy bastard, and a,
Shit Conference team.

He’s class, he’s scouse,
He’ll rob yer fucking house,
David Eyres,
David Eyres.

How many pints? (how many pints?)
Did Gregan have? (did Gregan have?)
How many pints did Gregan have?
He had a wank, in the chippy,
How many pints did Gregan have?

Preston boys, we are here,
Whoohoo, whoohoo,
Preston boys, we are here,
Whoohoo, whoohoo,
Preston boys, we are here,
Shag your women and drink your beer,
Whoohoohoohoooho

I like boys,
And I like pink,
And I like to act queer,
Cos I’m a big gay Blackpool fan,
Who’d love to shag your rear.

Steve McMahon is illegitimate,
He ain’t got no birth certificate,
He’s got aids and he cant get rid of it,
He’s a baldy bastard.

Away in a mainger,
No crib for a bed,
The little lord Jesus,
Looked up and he said,
We hate Blackpool, and we hate Blackpool,
We hate Blackpool, and we hate Blackpool,
We hate Blackpool, and we hate Blackpool,
We are the Blackpool haters.

My garden shed (my garden shed),
Is bigger than this (is bigger than this)
My garden shed is bigger than this,
It’s got a door and a window,
My garden shed is bigger than this.

Your off to shag your sister,
Your off to shag your sister.
(to Burnley)

Oh Lancashire (oh Lancashire),
Is wonderful (is wonderful),
Oh Lancashire is wonderful,
Its full of tits, fanny and Preston,
Oh Lancashire is wonderful.

This old man,
He told me,
Owen Oyston’s got V.D.
With a small school girl,
And his one-inch dick,
Owen Oyston’s down the nick.

He’s sewing bags, he sewing bags,
He’s sewing,
Oyston’s sewing bags.
He’s sewing bags, he sewing bags,
He’s sewing,
Oyston’s sewing bags.

Posh Spice is a slapper,
She plays with Brooklyn’s toys,
And when she’s shagging Beckham,
She thinks of David Moyes.
She takes it up the shitter,
And Beckham’s always wankin’,
And when she takes it up the ass,
She thinks of Mark Rankine.

I am a Preston fan,
I come from down Deepdale,
And I can sing (what can you sing?)
I can sing the P-N-E,
Whooooahhhhhhh!
Pia, Pia, PNE, PNE, PNE,
Pia, Pia, PNE, Pia P-N-E.

I had a pie, and it was nice,
And Balti was it’s namo,
B-A-L-T-I, B-A-L-T-I, B-A-L-T-I,
And Balti was it’s namo.
I had a pie, and it was nice,
And Balti was it’s namo,
*-A-L-T-I, *-A-L-T-I, *-A-L-T-I,
And Balti was it’s namo.
I had a pie, and it was nice,
And Balti was it’s namo,
*-*-L-T-I, *-*-L-T-I, *-*-L-T-I,
And Balti was it’s namo.
I had a pie, and it was nice,
And Balti was it’s namo,
*-*-*-T-I, *-*-*-T-I, *-*-*-T-I,
And Balti was it’s namo.
I had a pie, and it was nice,
And Balti was it’s namo,
*-*-*-*-I, *-*-*-*-I, *-*-*-*-I,
And Balti was it’s namo.
I had a pie, and it was nice,
And Balti was it’s namo,
*-*-*-*-*, *-*-*-*-*, *-*-*-*-*,
And Balti was it’s namo.

One man went to shit (shit),
Went to shit on Blackpool (scum),
One man and his baseball bat,
Went to shit on Blackpool.
Two men went to shit (shit),
Went to shit on Blackpool (scum),
Two men, one man and his baseball bat,
Went to shit on Blackpool.
Three men went to shit (shit),
Went to shit on Blackpool (scum),
Three men, two men, one man and his baseball bat,
Went to shit on Blackpool…..
(to ten)

We'll be running round Blackburn with our willys hanging out,
We'll be running round Blackburn with our willys hanging out,
We'll be running round Blackburn, running round Blackburn,
Running round Blackburn with our willys hanging out,
Singing I've got a bigger one than you,
Singing I've got a bigger one than you,
Singing I've got a bigger, I've got a bigger,
I've got a bigger one than you.

Your gonna get your fucking heads kicked,
Cos we all come from the north of Engerland,
Your gonna get your fucking heads kicked,
Cos we all come from the north of Engerland,

We had joy,
We had fun,
We had Blackpool on the run,
But the fun didn’t last,
Cos the bastards ran too fast.

What’s it like, What’s it like,
What’s it like to shag a sheep,
What’s it like to shag a sheep.
(To Blackpool)

When I was just a little boy,
I asked my mother what should I be,
Should I blackpool?
Or PNE?
Here’s what she said to me…
‘Wash your mouth my son,
Go get your fathers,
We’ll shoot some Blackpool scum,
Shoot some Blackpool scum’,
Whooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!
We hate Blackpool and we hate Blackpool,
We hate Blackpool and we hate Blackpool,
We hate Blackpool and we hate Blackpool,
We are the Blackpool haters.
Sea, sea, seaside shit,
Sea, sea, seaside shit,
Sea, sea, seaside shit,
Sea, sea, seaside shit.

Who’s that jumping off the pier?
Who’s that drowning in the sea?
Oh it’s Stevie and the boys,
Making all the fucking noise,
Cos they can’t beat the famous PNE.

We hate tangerine, say we hate tangerine,
We hate tangerine, say we hate tangerine.

If I had the wings of a sparrow,
And the dirty black arse of a crow,
I’d fly over Ewood tomorrow,
And shit on the bastards below,
Shit on, shit on, shit on the bastards below (below),
Shit on, shit on, shit on the bastards below (below).

Wise men say,
Only fools rush in,
But I can’t help falling in love with you,
Take my hand,
Take my whole life too,
For I can’t help falling in love with you,
The North End,
The North End.

Your just a soft southern bastard,
Soft southern bastard,
Your just a soft southern bastard,
SOFT SOUTHERN BASTARD.

Oh yes you know (oh yes you know)
What you can do (what you can do)
Oh yes you know what you can do,
You can take off your bra and knickers,
And I will shove my cock up you.